Addicts Believe in Something. But what?

Addicts Believe in Something. But what?

Recently, a parent raised the concern for her son in that he didn’t believe in something bigger than himself like God or a higher power and that he was not helpless to his drug use. Somewhat perplexed, she didn’t know how to respond to him for she is a woman of faith, believing that there is some larger divine force. When those who suffer from the consequences of substance abuse don’t see a higher power or God and they are not helpless to the substance abuse, the markers are present that the person is needing to some more “research.” That is, they have not come to a place where they are willing to see things as out of control and are still manageable if they work a little harder.
Everyone believes in something. If you don’t believe or have some kind of investigation into the Divine, then you more likely believe in yourself. Unfortunately, that only leads to more despair and chaos. For we, as humanly defined, are limited and broken. There is no concept of reality, grounded in space and time, which can generate peace in mind or heart. “If I could do this or have that or if they would do this, everything would be fine.” That is insanity at play. However, as humans, we have to have these kinds of direct experiences ourselves. No one can impart the wisdom or insights that can only come from direct experience. Most of the time, but not always, the experience of “brokenness” is where we can dump our preconceived notions of “reality” and be in a place of humility and surrender. Now, something bigger than our self-derived notion of self might squeak into our cognition, thoughts.
How does one support another in discovering that Truth? The 12-Step process revolves around Faith. So, the assumption here is that if you want recovery, one needs at some point buy into the concept of the Divine and begin having a direct experience in an aware way. That means to aid others in recovery, the other points to or helps illuminate the Divine.
If you are a person of Faith, whatever that religion of spiritual configuration may be, the gift you can offer someone is to surrender their process to their own selves and to That which you believe is Holy. Surrendering the fate of our child when we have direct experiences of how we have sheltered and encouraged growth in our child fosters an illusion that it is us, the parent, which has protected and developed our child. Unfortunately, that is a setup for suffering. For the Divine has used us to be that instrument to support the child in which That which is Holy has given us as parents stewardship. That is, the child that you may have given birth to is God’s child and you have stewardship with that child. God runs the show, not the parent. Therefore, it becomes a marker in our growth as parents when we recognize that our children are under the development of the divine and that does not mean we are in control.
Once we come to terms with our sense of surrendering and recognition of not being in control as parents, or those active in Recovery, now offer something very special to our children. For the greatest form of leadership is leading by example. Moreover, when our child experiences our sense of humility, surrendering, and acceptance, she has a model on the continuum of time and space that exemplifies how to look toward something that is much bigger than herself. You have given her a gift from God through your own submission to Faith. Nonetheless, it is between that person and the Divine who do the dance. We become part of the landscape that offers the other a chance to have a bit of a handrail in her awakening.